1) When you’re seated in row fifty-two or so and the plane is stopped at the end of the flight and then you get up and push past everyone sitting patiently in rows thirty on up because you can’t wait like the rest of us plebeians for the people ahead of you to exit in an orderly fashion. Unless you have a connecting flight, this makes you a jerk. You are not the Pope. You are not Batman, needing to get back to Gotham to fight the Penguin. Wait the extra twenty minutes like the rest of us.
2) When you’re by the aisle or window and you use both of your armrests, disregarding the person in the middle. I just can’t even.
3) When you’re openly impatient with screaming kids. Dude: okay. Listening to a child make sounds like a wookie with a sore throat is no one’s idea of a great time. But it’s not like the kid’s like, “How can I inconvenience a group of grumpy strangers today?” Unless the kid’s a criminal mastermind, and stranger things have happened. They can’t even control their bowels in the cases of the younger ones, and none of them understand the philosophical intricacies of life. Their ears are popping and hurting, they’re scared, they’re in a cramped area, and in the cases of the ones who understand they’re in a metal container hurtling through space… they’re in a metal container hurtling through space, and they can’t communicate their frustration/fear/pain in any other way.
I worked for a while on a metaphor about waking up in a tiny life support pod, in a space ship, with a bunch of aliens surrounding you in life support pods, and you feel like your head is being used to open jars the smashy, shattery way, and when you try to talk to the aliens they grimace and turn away from you because they can’t understand you and to their alien ears your voice is harsh and grating. That seems basically equivalent to me. Not perfect, but almost.
4) Tuna. Fish. Sandwiches.
5) In the airport, if someone (namely: me) is clumsy, have a little buffer zone of empathy. Some people (namely: me) have bad eyesight and worse coordination, and if you’re walking too close to them (me) stumbly, bumping-into-you things may happen. I will apologize profusely, but if you give me the stink eye, I am kind of judging you a little. Of course, the buffer empathy extends both ways, and I get that you’re probably not having a great day, just… be aware: not everyone is a graceful swan on a placid lake. Some people are me.